Just When You Thought Everything Was Fine

I’ll jump to it. Sometime shortly after my last entry, the wound area on my neck started to get red, bumpy, and flare up again. It hurt.

Through a couple of appointments, which included a CT and a PT scan, and a biopsy, it’s exactly what I suspected. The cancer is still there. It’s back on the neck area (no open wound), but there is also a nodule under my chin, and on my left clavicle (collar bone).

Today, February 2, I had a Radiation consult with a doctor who’s been doing this for over three decades. I don’t know zippity-do-da about radiation or what it entails. But I do know it’s effective.

Radiation could begin before the end of the week. I’ll know in a few days. I don’t have to worry about sickness or the skin burning (the latter of which is a misnomer). The skin is red from inflammation, not burning. I got three small tattoos on my chest for them to line me up when I start radiation. Like marker points. (Yes, the tatts are permanent.) It could run eighteen days or more. Monday through Friday, no weekends. It’s inconvenient, at most. But if I’m done with radiation and the tumor(s) start to shrink - and continue to do so - then giving up February for treatment isn’t such a bad deal. It certainly beats six months of chemotherapy.

I’m due to talk to a palliative nurse about pain management. The area really hurts right now. My pain wavers between a 3 and a 9. I take Tylenol, use Lidocaine ointment on the skin, and I have some Tramadol from the biopsy. None of it makes it go away completely. It’s painful to lift my arm, so I don’t. Tramadol is an opioid and makes me sleepy, so I only take it when I go to bed. But I still, eventually, wake up with the area throbbing and stabbing with pain. I use a water bottle with ice in it, which helps. (Heat doesn’t.) I hope the nurse can offer something better for the month. I do think I should have some relief within the first week once the tumor starts to shrink.

I’m feeling quite positive about radiation and don’t feel any hesitation with it, the way I did with chemo. I face far fewer side effects, and for a far shorter time, should there be any to face. The radiation sessions are just a few minutes, probably under ten-minutes total to treat all three areas. It’s just the daily grind of it that we’ll have to adjust to for now. But we’ll likely be at the VA and back within 90 minutes total, including travel time.

That’s all I know or have to say about it. Feel free to text or reach out if you feel moved. I’m always around. Brian is right by my side, and I’m glad he is - I don’t know if I could keep doing all this without support like that.